To Love and Let Go: A Memoir of Love, Loss, and Gratitude
While on her way to teach a yoga retreat in March 2014, Rachel Brathen collapses at an airport, brought to her knees by excruciating stomach pains. She is rushed to the hospital on the tiny island of Bonaire, and hours later forced to undergo surgery. When she wakes up from anesthesia, her boyfriend is weeping at her bedside. While Rachel was struck down with seemingly mysterious pain, her best friend, Andrea, sustained fatal injuries as a result of a car accident. Rachel and Andrea had a magical friendship. Though they looked nothing alike—one girl tall, blond, and Swedish, the other short, brunette, and Colombian—everyone called them gemelas: twins.
Over the three years following Andrea’s death, at what might appear from the outside to be the happiest time—with her engagement to the man she loves and a blossoming career that takes her all over the world—Rachel faces a series of trials that have the potential to define her life. Unresolved grief and trauma from her childhood make the weight of her sadness unbearable. At each turn, she is confronted again and again with a choice: Will she lose it all, succumb to grief, and grasp for control that’s beyond her reach? Or can she move through the loss and let go?
When Rachel and her husband conceive a child, pregnancy becomes a time to heal and an opportunity to be reborn herself. As she recounts this transformative period, Rachel shares her hard-won wisdom about life and death, love and fear, what it means to be a mother and a daughter, and how to become someone who walks through the fire of adversity with the never-ending practice of loving hard and letting go.
Reviews (161)
Very good but for a younger crowd
I guess I am going to be the only person on here giving 4 stars. And this is why... I think this is a great book for someone under the age of 35. She has been through a lot for her age. I will not deny that. She has an amazing gift of putting her feelings into words (I have followed her since the beginning on Instagram) and she is wise beyond her years for sure. I love following her and her adventures, I love watching videos of her adorable little girl. She is one of the few accounts I watch on a daily basis. But right now she hasn't been married that long, her daughter is still under 4 years old. I would love to see what she writes 10 years from now. I did find that at times for every trauma she went through.. there was always some amazing gift given to her after it. She must be the only person I ever knew that gets so many signs from the "other side". Even her difficult labor... when most women would be begging for medication, she suddenly feels Andrea's presence and all is fine. Most everything she goes through she gets some amazing spiritual gift out of it. I don't think she is making it up at all, it's just hard to relate to that. I honestly would love to read a book by her mother. Rachel cannot quite understand the things that happen later in life, and especially once your children are teenagers. I was also a little bit disappointed she didn't touch on the issues she had where friends of her betrayed her with one of her businesses. Not sure if she couldn't or wouldn't share that. But I know it was heartbreaking for her.
Raw, vulnerable, inspiring and healing.
There are not enough words to describe how beautiful and powerful this book is. Almost every page had me feeling so emotional and raw. Rachels words felt like they were written just for me. Everytime I finished a chapter I felt so open, so raw yet so grounded and on a path towards my own healing. I didn’t know I needed to read this book until I opened it. Rachel has been my inspiring guide for the last 5yrs. I found her instagram during a dark time of loss for myself and she was going through the same. She helped me find my inner light again and through this book she is doing it again. Everyone needs this to read this book and you will know why once you start. Thank you thank you thank you
Learning to heal and knowing you are more than enough.
I read this intricately beautiful book in 2 days. It is honest, vulnerable, raw and so incredibly inspiring. All characteristics that completely embody Rachel Brathen. She is a sincere writer and has a way of compassionately drawing the reader in. What she shares is both a relatable and an accessible look into the human experience of love, growth and loss. This book will help so many humans heal and give permission to feel. As a psychotherapist, body image/eating concerns specialist, I recommend this book to anyone struggling with grief, insecurities or the feeling of not being enough. As a social worker, I am in awe of Rachel's drive to support humans in need and fight for those who can't. She is such a phenomenal force, who will continue to change the world. I began following Rachel in 2014. In 2015, after watching the Libertini puppies on Instagram that she and Dennis were fostering from birth to 8 weeks, my husband and I applied to adopt one of them. Soon after, we brought little Leo Libertini home. Not only has Sgt. Pepper's Friends saved so many lives, but it's also helped create community. All of the other Libertini parents kept in touch and a year later, we were approached and able to adopt Leo's little brother Linus (Hank). It was really beautiful reading all about Pepper, and the inspiration for this rescue. I have had seven losses of loved ones over the past 12 years. Four of which have happened over the past six years, the most recent two, over the past week. All during the time I have followed Rachel. Through her stories on Instagram and through reading this book, I have felt continual love light and support. While reading this book, I felt my heart open up and my healing journey continue. I am also grateful for the love of these little pups who licked away the tears so many times. My husband and I got married last October and went to Aruba on our honeymoon. While at Island Yoga/Nourish Cafe we had the divine pleasure of meeting Rachel, Dennis and Lea Luna. In person, Rachel eminates so much light and life force energy. They are incredible souls. As a 500 hour registered yoga instructor, I am aware of the healing power of meditation, yoga and connection through this community. Rachel continually inspires everyone to find their path of love both on and off the mat. Thank you so much for sharing your story. I highly recommend this book and will continue to gift it to others.
You’re not alone
Rachel has been inspiring me and teaching me lessons for years through Instagram, and this book offered a deeper, more meaningful insight into the journey any human can take on this planet. Every human has hardships. This book really shows you that you don’t need to hide and run away from that, it’s ok to struggle through and come out clearer on the other side. As long as you listen to heart and trust your intuition you don’t have to be afraid to feel anything that you’re dealt. I appreciate the stories that explain some of the most impactful moments of Rachel life to date and give everyone the courage to show up for themselves.
It should come with a warning label, you’re going to cry.
I have followed Rachel from the very beginning. More than 7 (I think?) years of following her journey, watching her layers become unpeeled by the hands of life. Softening her, and providing her the space to lay out her truth. I’ve read these chapters before. Not only from Rachel’s social platforms, but from my own life. Rachel unveiled many lessons for me. Throughout the book, I could feel every emotion she laid into her words. When she cried, I was sobbing. When she was smiling, I was smiling. When she spoke of death, I felt it.. at times I could smell it. Rachel has a way with words, arranging them in such a way that a force is born. A force that pulls you in and makes you listen. It’s weird, how someone can put just their own life story into a book without realizing that the words they are speaking are inevitably someone else’s too. I thank you, Rachel. Thank you thank you thank you
If you're looking for healing, please read this book
About three years ago I came across Yoga Girl on Instagram. Not really knowing who she was or what she was about I followed her purely because she had "yoga" in her name. I've followed her on Instagram since then and listened to every episode of her podcast, completely enamored with her words and her realness. She's inspired me to look inwards and take the steps to heal my own heart. Just received the book in the mail. I've only read the dedication and I'm already sobbing. Please, buy this book. 💖
Will Break Your Heart Wide Open and Put It Back Together
I am almost done reading this for the second time. To Love and Let Go is one of those books that enters your life just when it's supposed to, and changes everything. The story of my best friend's death just before my wedding is nearly identical to Rachel's. I am so grateful she wrote this book and shared her story. It's helped me feel less alone in the universe. If you have dealt with grief, loss, or trauma, this book is for you. Even if you haven't experienced those, read it anyway. It's a raw, vulnerable story that was hard to read at times because it hit so close to home. But it's a story that is REAL. Thanks Rachel, for sharing your story (and Andrea's) with the world. It's definitely a book I will keep and cherish forever. If you're on the fence, do yourself a favor and read it. You'll feel more connected to yourself, to those you love, to Rachel, and to the Universe when you are done.
A heart felt book for anyone who’s experienced the pain of loss.
I was so excited for this book I pre-ordered it in May and it was a beautiful surprise waiting for me yesterday in the mail box. Rachel has such an amazing way of writing about her grief and loss that you cannot help but relate to. Her words are beautiful and this book just goes to show the beautiful heart she also has. I highly recommend this as someone going through my own experience of losing a loved one. I hadn’t found a book that truly spoke to me and the difficult feelings is been going through but Rachel nails it all. The good, the bad, the ugly and everything in between. I already can’t wait to read it again.
BLOW YOUR HEART OPEN
WOW- wow wow wow wow wow - I have loved and followed Rachel for many many years and knew of her stories via Instagram. I have read and own her other book, Yoga Girl and loved it. Now for the full disclosure - I bought this book and sat with it for one week before picking it up. I was afraid to. I knew what I was holding was something that was so powerful that I would journey with her and in turn, myself. So I took some time to sit with it and when it was time, I began. I read the whole book over the course of next week. Usually, I am a super fast reader - I devour books. But this one is different. I had to pause between stories, chapters, thoughts and allow allow allow trust trust trust. I wept with her. I held her and was held by her. I journeyed with her and felt what she felt. It broke my broken heart and it is starting to help mend it. I finally allowed the truth that I have shut down my own self and heart out of pain and trauma and fear. And she is showing me that it is OK and safe to start to let the cracks develop in my sealed heart to allow light. This book will change you. This book changed me. ALLOW TRUST Let the light in. YOU ARE SAFE AND SO DIVINELY LOVED
Beautifully written and heartbreakingly honest
I was introduced to Rachel’s story in March of 2014. As I read her words, I cried alongside her through her losses and celebrated all her victories along the way. Rachel’s grief was palpable through her writing, and her vulnerability was unlike anything I’ve seen before. Her story touched my heart in a way that was foreign to me, she was experiencing one of my worst nightmares in real time. I remember checking in constantly, and feeling for her so deeply, as if she were a close friend. I’ve been awaiting this book for years. It is a beautiful tribute to a transitional time in Rachel’s life, and it is more than I ever could have anticipated. I’ve never read any book cover to cover in less than 24 hours, but I could not put this down. It sounds silly, but I’m so proud of all she has done. Reading this book, you’ll realize that you should be proud of yourself for all of your battles, as well. Rachel has a magical way of putting words to the emotions we all feel, but can’t describe. I hope you get the chance to read this and crack open your heart, your mind, and your soul. We all need a little bit more light. Thank you for sharing your heart with us, Rachel.
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